Wherever you go, there you are.

And here I am, sitting in a folding metal chair with a floral print cushion, at a little round wooden table that my laptop is sharing with various clipboards and papers, and the empty bowl and spoon that had contained my dinner of homemade lentil soup with brown rice. The table is wedged in between the closet and twin bunk beds of my cozy dorm room at the Sitka International Hostel. Room number six. I'm on duty for my first shift here, as the primary "houseparents" are out on an island, trekking to a forest service cabin to celebrate their first anniversary. It's pouring rain. Has been for days, and probably will for many more. I was proud of myself for going out hiking despite the weather. Only for about an hour, but it counts.

Where to begin? My trip, my trip, I know...I know. I didn't blog. Although, I do have what I think is a passable excuse: while I was in Haines, on day three of my journey, I forgot my laptop & power cord on top of my trunk, and drove like that down the windy road out of town, for quite a ways, trying to remember where the crazy little cabin on the water, where I was to stay that night (more on that later), was located. Amazingly, my laptop had managed to grip on for dear life and remained unscathed when I finally arrived. My power cord, however, was not so lucky, and may still be sitting in a ditch somewhere in Haines. So I remained without a power cord for my laptop for the remainder of my trip, and only this very afternoon did I finally receive a replacement.

I will fill you in bit by bit about my adventures over the last two months, but not all at once. I think it's better to bring up those countless anecdotes one at a time, so as not to bore either one of us in their conveyance.

Now that I am settled in one place for a while, my new mission now is this: to work as much as possible, and spend as little as possible, in order to reduce my debt as much as possible by the end of next summer.

Oh, but before I get into that, maybe I'll briefly explain how I came to be here, at this hostel in Sitka, rather than back in cozy, snowy, home sweet Homer, which is where I had every intention of ending up this winter. Hmm, that's a difficult sentence to follow. Do I say "it goes like this?" "this is how it happened?" How awkward. Still, not any better. I'll just abruptly begin.

My ferry out of Prince Rupert had arrived in Juneau, where I was to spend one day, then take a brief side-trip to Sitka to visit my friends there before continuing on to Haines and ultimately Homer. But a few days prior, while I was still nestled in an apartment above a restaurant on Commercial Drive in Vancouver, my good friend in Sitka (who is a librarian and knows everything about everything in town) had called me up to let me know that someone had asked her if she knew anyone who might be interested in becoming the new part-time hostel assistant in exchange for free housing. She immediately thought of me, both because I was in the market for cheap housing, and because I have a keen interest in the hostel business. She and I both imagined that it would be a highly sought-after position in this small town, and although I was intrigued, I didn't know what the chances were that it would work out.

So, back to Juneau. I had a full day there, and was embarrassingly overdue for an oil change, so I took my car to the shop. When I went to pick it up, they informed my that I had worn my tires all the way down to the wire braids, and that they were NOT safe to drive on for any substantial distance. I had originally planned on making my round trip Sitka visit without my car, but I decided I'd better bring it with me and get new tires put on before making the final leg of my journey, from Haines to Homer. I'm glad I did. Not the new tires. Well, yes, I suppose I needed them even though they set me back over $500 that I didn't have. But the real reason I'm glad I brought my car is because it contained all my essential belongings (like my hula hoop!) and after finding out that the hostel definitely wanted me, I ended up canceling my ferry tickets back to Juneau and Haines.

Suddenly my "short visit" had turned into an indefinite stay. I started looking for jobs, and within three days I was working nine hours on a Sunday as a legal assistant. I have since also signed up for shifts at the coffee shop I used to work at during my college years, and discovered that the hostel, in addition to free housing, also gives me a $150 grocery credit at the store. (Yes, it is a small enough town to simply say "the store" and not have it be particularly vague. To be fair, there are two grocery stores, but...yikes, how do I get pulled into these tangents?) I was thrilled to find out about the stipend, and am determined to live off of it for as long as I am receiving it (hence the homemade lentil soup with rice, of which I have four more containers in the freezer!)

Oh, good, I've finally made it back around to what I was saying earlier about my new mission to reduce my debt. I have no problem being open about the state of my finances. I feel neither shame nor pride when it comes to money matters. But I definitely don't mean this as a plea for assistance. I am very, very grateful for the help my family has provided, but I claim all responsibility for my situation and in no way am I a victim of circumstance. I intentionally went into debt because I knew I needed to go out on my own, travel, and have some new experience, and I needed to do so immediately. So I did. And I'm glad I did. And now I am content to work long and hard to pay back the money a normal person would've saved up before commencing a six week vacation.

But it should get paid down quickly, with no living expenses and two jobs. The alarming credit card balance and the student loan should be gone by spring, and even the hefty $19,000 left on my car should be whittled down to $5,000 or so by this time next year, leaving me free to sell it for a profit if I decide to venture overseas. I will not end my year with savings, per se, but I will be free to travel cheaply and live and work anywhere I choose. Unless something unexpected happens that will change my plans completely, which I've found to be the most common outcome in my life. Perhaps I will happen upon a large sum of money. Perhaps I will incur a major medical expense. Perhaps I will fall madly in love and get married. Perhaps I will start a business. Who knows? If there's one thing I've learned about life, it's to enjoy where you are at and not get attached to plans, however great they seem when you make them. Don't stop making them altogether. Definitely make them...just don't dwell on the future. Don't forget that the future is always an imaginary thing that may or may not happen. We do not have the power to do anything in the future, all we have control over is what we are doing right here, right now, and that is where we should seek satisfaction, entertainment, fulfillment, happiness. Seeking it within future events will only lead to disappointment, because one can never actually be in that imaginary place. And while memories of the past can be comforting, nostalgia is hardly any more tangible than hopeful fantasies. This doesn't sound gloomy, does it? I don't mean for it to. And really, I am probably as hardcore a daydreamer as there is. But I have found that focusing on what I enjoy about where I am and what I'm doing right now is what brings me the most pleasure. It's when I start dwelling on things I wish I had, places I wish I were, or people I miss, that I start to be discontent. I guess my philosophy lines up pretty well with the whole eastern, Buddhist ideal of non-attachment. It makes sense. It works for me most of the time.

I feel like I could write pages and pages tonight, but I'm afraid that I will bore you, or take up too much of your time. You've already been incredibly diligent and patient to have read this far. Thank you for being my audience and for giving me the motivation to share my incoherent recollections and unoriginal epiphanies.

Be happy. Be well. Be free.

Next week: The Truth about Burning Man! ;)